Monthly Archives: July 2016

Lack of chest hair

“Yeah but I’m getting a pelt implant.”

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Explanation for why his crack hangs out of his underwear

“Sometimes my butt slides around.”

Giving himself a haircut

“I’m making my head look like a dolphin!”

Watching a show about a kid that can move things with her mind

“You know I used to be able to do things like that. I never told you about that?”

“This is how I make myself do things”

” ‘Get up and make some coffee, you fat fucking idiot!’ There are actually two people living inside me.”

Do you remember Chilly Willy?

“Yeah, he had that dope little hat.”