Monthly Archives: December 2013

While watching a pharmaceutical commercial that mentioned testing for TB

“Baby. I tested you for TB and you got it. True beauty.”

Waking up on his birthday

“Oh my god it’s my birthday! I’m one-hundred-and-four.”

Quotable quotes. (Snort)

“Life is about habit. Either you habit or you don’t.”

Predicting plot turns in a superhero movie

“It’s always the bad guy!”

Botched the ol’ “I got your nose” joke in a way that completely ruins it (if you consider it something possible to ruin)

“I got your thumb!”

A particularly bad smell

“OH GAWD it smells like the bathroom of every Ponderosa.”

You don’t even want to know the context

“Yo, his and hers. You get a full butter knife, she gets a little cheese knife.”