Monthly Archives: November 2012

Autocorrect doesn’t know his last name.

“Man!! It’s my effin’ phone and it says Smell! Jason Smell!”

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Making fun of the lady-on-PBS-fundraising-drive’s shirt

“Man, that shirt looks like someone made out with a monkey and then doodoo came out and it was that shirt.”

You always want the best for your kids

“I hope we don’t have a kid with Aspergers. I want a kid with cheeseburgers.”

Everyone else calls it Thanksgiving.

Jason calls it Brown Thursday.

Talking about Billy Crystal

“C Billy. Crystal Bills.”

I’m scared to make the cat mad because I’m worried he will poop on the bed. Jason tries to help.

“Close our door – put some big poop sheet on the other bed, maybe a water resistant poop curtain? Ha!”

I was cracking my knuckles and toes and other crackly parts (as usual)

“Can I say something? You’re a crack addict.”